I have created this page in hopes someone can help or perhaps this will help someone. My story of a soldier who returns from Iraq with PTSD.
My husband is a victim of Veterans Administration abuse and bullying tactics. He like countless other veterans is being bullied and mentally abused by the Veterans Administration.
My husband I like to refer to as "J" is a strong proud American Soldier, he will always be a soldier in my eyes. I'm so proud to be his wife. I have never felt a love as deep as the love he and I share, it is almost as we are one.
My husband was in Iraq in '04-'05 when I believe the fighting where he was, was at it's worst. He like countless other soldiers witnessed what I believe has forever changed them. He isn't the man who left from Ft. Hood, he came home is forever changed. This is forever changed me as well.
War is War... It is not kind to anyone involved from the soldiers who fight to the casualties of war, from the wives, husbands, children, family and friends at home that pray for their safe return. The military never prepares you for the aftermath of war. When the soldier returns home some-times that is when another war begins.
When my "J" came home with injuries physical and mental - most severe is the PTSD at 100% . I never dreamed our Veterans Administration would treat him as unfairly and abuse his rights and bully him for last 5 years. I would like to say this in passing and make this clear just because a veteran has PTSD doesn't make him a crazy person nor does it make him incompetent. I'm incredibly disturbed that the very people rights he protected and freedoms he protected are now washing their hands of veterans and abusing Federal Regs. I used to have faith in the system because it was created to help... How wrong was I, I used to shake my head and say that wont happen to us, we have the truth on our side. Seems lately my husband and I are the only ones telling the truth. I have never seen so many lies and untruths and false information from the VA being considered as the truth when it isn't even close to the truth. I am amazed that Federal laws are being violated every single day that were set in place to protect our SOLDIERS.
Title 38: Pensions, Bonuses, and Veterans' Relief
CHAPTER I: DEPARTMENT OF VETERANS AFFAIRS
PART 3: ADJUDICATION
Subpart A: Pension, Compensation, and Dependency and Indemnity Compensation
: Ratings for Special Purposes
3.353 - Determinations of incompetency and competency.
(a) Definition of mental incompetency. A mentally incompetent person is one who because of injury or disease lacks the mental capacity to contract or to manage his or her own affairs, including disbursement of funds without limitation.
(b) Authority. (1) Rating agencies have sole authority to make official determinations of competency and incompetency for purposes of: insurance (38 U.S.C. 1922), and, subject to ? 13.56 of this chapter, disbursement of benefits. Such determinations are final and binding on field stations for these purposes.
(2) Where the beneficiary is rated incompetent, the Veterans Service Center Manager will develop information as to the beneficiary's social, economic and industrial adjustment; appoint (or recommend appointment of) a fiduciary as provided in ? 13.55 of this chapter; select a method of disbursing payment as provided in ? 13.56 of this chapter, or in the case of a married beneficiary, appoint the beneficiary's spouse to receive payments as provided in ? 13.57 of this chapter; and authorize disbursement of the benefit.
(3) If in the course of fulfilling the responsibilities assigned in paragraph (b)(2) the Veterans Service Center Manager develops evidence indicating that the beneficiary may be capable of administering the funds payable without limitation, he or she will refer that evidence to the rating agency with a statement as to his or her findings. The rating agency will consider this evidence, together with all other evidence of record, to determine whether its prior determination of incompetency should remain in effect. Reexamination may be requested as provided in ? 3.327(a) if necessary to properly evaluate the beneficiary's mental capacity to contract or manage his or her own affairs.
(c) Medical opinion. Unless the medical evidence is clear, convincing and leaves no doubt as to the person's incompetency, the rating agency will make no determination of incompetency without a definite expression regarding the question by the responsible medical authorities. Considerations of medical opinions will be in accordance with the principles in paragraph (a) of this section. Determinations relative to incompetency should be based upon all evidence of record and there should be a consistent relationship between the percentage of disability, facts relating to commitment or hospitalization and the holding of incompetency.
(d) Presumption in favor of competency. Where reasonable doubt arises regarding a beneficiary's mental capacity to contract or to manage his or her own affairs, including the disbursement of funds without limitation, such doubt will be resolved in favor of competency (see ? 3.102 on reasonable doubt).
(e) Due process. Whenever it is proposed to make an incompetency determination, the beneficiary will be notified of the proposed action and of the right to a hearing as provided in ? 3.103. Such notice is not necessary if the beneficiary has been declared incompetent by a court of competent jurisdiction or if a guardian has been appointed for the beneficiary based upon a court finding of incompetency. If a hearing is requested it must be held prior to a rating decision of incompetency. Failure or refusal of the beneficiary after proper notice to request or cooperate in such a hearing will not preclude a rating decision based on the evidence of record.
In our home we have what I have referred to for many years as "The WAR Room" where my sweet loving husband had all his achievements hung on the wall, from his metals so elegantly placed behind glass to awards hanging neatly on the walls to a beautiful wall tapestry he had made while in Iraq. For many years I have come into this room and looked around and had this deep warm loving feeling that all my husbands efforts were hanging in this room something to be so proud of. I came home two months ago and to my surprise all the awards and metals, etc were removed from the walls and packed neatly into a foot-locker. When I walked over to my husband that was sitting in his chair in front of the computer with his head hung down I asked him why he had packed away all "The WAR Room" stuff... The answer from him was very simple and flat in tone, he simply said, I was a soldier and a proud one and I have begged God for forgiveness for the things I have done in war, but I'm not proud anymore. Then he began to say to me with tears in his eyes, honey "I'm not incompetent" the VA doctor says I'm not... Why is the VA saying I am. I replied yes sweetheart I know your not and I don't know why anyone would say you are. I began to cry with him.
Times have been very tough on our family since my husbands return from Iraq we have struggled to make ends meet and robbed Peter to pay Paul some of the times. Stretching money as far as we could make it stretch and doing with out some things that people take for granted every single day.
I'm always amazed when I call the VA hospital in Dallas and the opening statement when you call says: Welcome home Soldiers returning from Iraq and Afghanistan were here to help you... I have to laugh to keep from screaming because help isn't what you get at all and if that is what anyone is offering at the VA I'm thinking Soldiers like my "J" don't need that kind of help at all. I would love for once for someone to do the right thing for a Soldier follow the rules and regs abide by them and actually help a Veteran. I have found over the years that when a Soldier comes home the Government is done with them, hoping the less help they give to them the Soldier will just get fed up and go away or perhaps there just waiting for the Soldier to die so they don't have do the right thing for them anymore.
The VA expects a veteran to live on little to no money and they expect them to live in poverty after all they served the purpose they were needed for no need for the Soldier to have any quality of life anymore.
I will say this and I speak for my family alone today on this blog but I am sure their are many families that feel the way I feel tonight. I will fight for my husband and his rights to the day I die, he matters, he counts, he is My American Soldier he is my "J" for better or worse till death do us part. I love you my sweet husband more than you will ever know. Forever yours - R
